[MEMORIES] *stepping away from reality.

Hey xxx, look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according To plan?
Do you think I'm wasting my time
Doing things I Wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't pretend that I'm alright
And you can't change me

*Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be Perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be Perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing alright

*

Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand

*,*

(copyright: Simple Plan- Perfect)

i tried and i tried but maybe nothing is good enough. nothing is makes me special. i've gone through the stage where i think you are not proud of me, but you told me that you are. i believe but you only said that when i'm insecure. it makes me think, maybe you just say it when i did something good, for me. everytime i did something wrong, it will be a big scolding, but why must the scolding be more than the praising? i'm not perfect! i tried to help, but for a mistake i get scold. it seems like the thing is more important to me. i am really tired. you said that the society don't give enough compliment, but i'm still growing. i still can't face those yet. i am happy for the things you did for me, grateful too, but sometimes i just question, are you happy that i am here. you said that i was your biggest problem, maybe it was sarcastic or maybe it was right. i want to cry, but no tears coming down. my finger and toe are bleeding from just now repairing the thing that i broken, but my heart hurts deeper than anything. all i really want is a compliment for whatever i did that impresses you. if you are not impress then what impresses you? i will think of something to get the compliments. WHY MUST COMPLIMENT STOP WHEN WE GROW UP? i got alots of thing, but maybe i want this. maybe i write this too sarcasticly but i am just writing what i think. but no matter what, i still love you and always will.

i want to sit down in a corner, not to cry, to think things out. i am happy for all my friends, i am happy for having the chance to meet all my friends. i will never change that, but i have been thinking, front and the back classes difference. in one of the difference sometimes kind of pisses me off, luckily the front class student didn't say it out in front of me. even though their result sucks, but they have all the fun. i have more memories with them. even though you think differently, just don't say it in front of me. i will really scold it in your face but i still like all of you. i just don't want critic about someone you don't know.

nobody is perfect!
i wish......

i miss you guys.